


holding onto you

by spritzerr



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Anxiety, Cute, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, How Do I Tag, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, Keith/Lance (Voltron) Fluff, Lance (Voltron) is a Good Boyfriend, M/M, Panic Attacks, Shiro (Voltron) is a Good Sibling, Soft Keith/Lance (Voltron), he's scared of storms, lance's fam is so pure, very good, we all love shiro btw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:48:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26935378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spritzerr/pseuds/spritzerr
Summary: It was only the weather, why did it end up like this?
Relationships: Keith & Shiro (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron), mentioned
Comments: 4
Kudos: 55





	holding onto you

**Author's Note:**

> I JUST STARTED LAUGHING XD I have to beta my works better, this one had COSTS instead of fists in the whole story  
> and I dunno how it even happened  
> I SWEAR I THOUGHT IT WAS FISTS  
> nevermind, onto the notes:
> 
> hey, this story wasn't meant to exist, but here we are! I'm still working on of flowers and cigarettes, dw!!
> 
> it happened when there was this hard storm near my house and I panicked so much,, so i coped with it by writing this little fic, it may not be the best but it helped me a lot!
> 
> please note that it shows Keith dealing with a brief panic attack, it's not really descriptive, but it's a trigger warning still!! stay safe!
> 
> also, you may have different experiences with panic attacks, but please remember that everyone is different and has their own ways so,,,, yeahhh
> 
> hope you enjoy it!!

Nights at the Serrano household were usually rather loud, noisy, many people were going around the house. Kitchen was invaded all the time, because Lance’s family didn’t know anything about eating dinners together. He didn’t mind that at all, though most of the time it was an absolute disaster. His parents had to be yelling at everyone to hold everything together, because they didn’t feel like cleaning the whole house again. These nights were a usual routine of the Serrano family and they didn’t even know or realize when Keith became the average guest. It just happened, he came and stayed like it was a thing he’d been doing on a daily basis. His person fitted perfectly, like this one remaining seat by the table was just _meant_ for him. It probably was, maybe not exactly for _him_ personally, but for someone who would get this close to Lance as Keith did.

Keith liked having sleepovers at Lance’s, they made him feel like he was truly a part of this family. Not that he didn’t enjoy spending time with Shiro – his adoptive brother and a legal guardian of five years – and Shiro’s newlywed husband – Adam. Keith loved them for sure, but Lance’s family was a whole new experience. Shiro and Adam were far more like friends to him, he didn’t think of them as his _dad's,_ while Lance’s parents… they were Keith’s parents as well. Shiro liked to joke around that they had stolen Keith from him, probably faking all of the adoption papers (Lance _would_ convince them to do that).

That one night in October, Keith was sat on the sofa, ready to have a true glow up done by Lance’s (not only) younger sisters. He didn’t really mind it, but he started when they told him how long he had to stay still for. Half an hour was way too much for his liking, even if it equaled having Lance to hug him from behind all the time. Rachel had to give up after… five minutes, because Keith was constantly snuggling closer to Lance, which meant her job couldn’t be done properly.

“Can’t you just sit like a decent human being while I am applying the facemask on!?” She was blaming him when she angrily placed the container on the coffee table. Keith was annoying then, because he only grinned and let Lance pull him even closer than before. Rachel knew her job here was donez she couldn’t fight with her lovestruck brother and his even more lovestruck boyfriend.

“Nah,” Keith replied, watching Rachel’s face become more and more red from anger. He could, technically, have all of this skincare done, but cuddling with Lance seemed like a much better idea for him.

The way Lance was acting towards him left Keith completely amazed and mesmerized like never before. His hands were impossibly soft, always smelled like strawberries from that creme he was using. They brushed against Keith’s bare skin, tenderly touching his collarbones or arms. They sometimes rest peacefully on Keith’s belly, wrapped around it gently yet protectively. It was the best part of Lance, his sweetness and caring personality were everything Keith could ever ask for.

Lance’s eyes were something Keith could literally die for. Their intense, blue ocean–like tone made him get lost in them over and over again. They might have been cold for people who didn’t know him, but one look was enough to change anyone’s opinion instantly. Lance’s eyes were the sweetest, the warmest, the most lovely ones Keith had ever seen in his whole life, which meant over eighteen years. Eyes showed the true personality, what the human was really feeling – that’s what Keith had read in some sort of psychological article some time ago. He had to fully agree with it, these eyes Lance had were like an open fate to his heart and Keith wasn’t complaining about that one.

“Wanna watch a movie?” Lance suggested, bringing up yet another family tradition. They were always watching something on Friday nights, when none of them had anything important to do for the next day. He waited for a reply, which consisted of Keith’s content hum only. It was a bit odd, how they were able to communicate with each other without using any actual words, but nobody had ever made a comment about it. They all guessed it must’ve been some sort of weird quirk that people in love had.

Lance’s mom walked over to the couch, quietly asking her son to move, so that the whole family would somehow fit on it. They were all squeezed tightly, but these moments were just simply perfect for Lance. He absolutely loved feeling his family close, it was even better when Shiro and Adam could come over. Unfortunately, they were both busy the next day and couldn’t really make it, but it was still nice out there. Keith had to be placed in between Lance’s legs, so he didn’t take too much room on the sofa, but even like that, Veronica had to sit in the fluffy carpet under the couch. It wasn’t the worst that could happen, as she could shamelessly cuddle with the family dog – Marrón.

The dog had always chosen Keith as the perfect cuddler, but seeing him wrapped in Lance’s arms made the animal realize he’s got to find someone else to give him all the attention he wanted. Lance loved to joke around that Keith was a lot like the dog, but he always argued about it. “No, I’m not! No offence, Marrón, but I’m nothing like you, got it? And you, Lance, have you ever even _seen_ an actual dog in your life? Do I look like one? If you say yes, we’re getting divorced immediately.” Something pretty similar to this.

“Movie it is, but remember we’re all leaving for the weekend, so take care of the house, mijo,” Emanuela said, preparing the DVD player and sitting herself near her husband – Diego. Lance nodded vigorously; it was his first time completely home alone for more than a day and he had high expectations about it. Also, he didn’t want to disappoint his mamá, who was really counting on him. “Is everyone packed?” She was asking this question for the tenth time that day, but still, everyone nodded and screamed “yes!”, scaring Keith to death.

He was almost asleep already, but still in this weird state when he wasn’t hearing people talking, but everything was back to normal when someone shouted. It was funny squared if we count up the fact that he literally jumped while being in Lance’s arms.

“If we could try and not get too excited about the movie, it would be nice,” he said, his thumb mindlessly tracing Keith’s jawline as he began to fall asleep again. “He had a hard day at school, art can be really tiring sometimes, so please,” it was unexpected, but they all agreed one by one. Lance’s whole family knew Keith more than he probably knew himself and they had already seen him before that night and they could easily tell how tired he was.

Lance didn’t pay attention to the movie at all, even if he was the one who had suggested watching in the first place. His smile was growing wider and wider each second as he looked at everyone. He loved seeing his family united like that, a little calmer than usual, but still so close. They were mumbling comments to one another, covering their mouths if they unexpectedly started laughing – they were really trying their best to obey what Lance said. He had to bury his face in Keith’s black locks once or twice when the movie got way too funny to hold it together. Keith’s eyes were half closed, he probably didn’t realize what was going on around him, but the way he was trying to stay awake like that was absolutely adorable.

The rain had started around then in the evening, when they were halfway through the film and the whole family slowly started to grab everything and head to the car in order to manage to get there before the weather got truly awful. They said quick goodbyes to both Keith and Lance before exiting the house, all excited to visit their family one state away. The reason why Lance was staring home was rather obvious – lying here on the couch with him.

“Hey, we should head back to my room,” he whispered, shaking Keith’s shoulder slightly – the last thing he wanted was to scare his boyfriend to death (again). He got a faint groan in response, proving that Keith was awake, but unwilling to get up. “Yeah, I know you don’t want to, but your back will thank me in the morning. Come on, get up, careful, I’ve got you,” Lance reassured him, slowly moving Keith to the side, so he was no longer lying on top of him. “Okay, now stand up and hold my hand, you don’t have to open your eyes if it hurts, I’ll guide you anyway.”

Keith mumbled something that sounded almost like a weak “I love you”, to which Lance chuckled and replied with a soft “Love you, too”. He was now glad that his room wasn’t upstairs, because Keith definitely wasn’t capable of walking to the upper floor like that. The faint sound of a movie wasn’t even hearable anymore, but Lance had completely forgotten to turn it off. The house was a little too quiet than what Keith remembered it to be when they first started watching, but it wasn’t anything he could think of at that time. He just wanted to sleep again after being woken up like that. Lance’s cute face was a nice thing to see right after waking up, but he really wanted to be back in bed.

Sleeping in the same bed was another extremely funny story. They always started with cuddling, but most of the time ended up with Lance on the floor, feet on the mattress and Keith in the weirdest position possible. Once, when Rachel came in to wake them up and saw this, she was almost sure that Keith must have had a few bones broken. _At least,_ it was impossible to lie or sleep in that position, and more – to be actually comfortable in it.

Lance looked at the window, he could hear the rain increasing second by second, but it had been worse sometimes, it was nothing to worry about. He laid Keith on the wall side of the bed and quietly asked for permission, which his boyfriend gave him by another faint nod, but that was enough. Lance tenderly touched his cold skin and pulled him a little closer to his chest, so that spooning could work without any additional problems. He heard Keith sigh with relief as Lance’s arms wrapped around his stomach. Lance could feel him relaxing under his touch and he realized once again that it was the best part of hugging Keith.

Lance always waited until Keith fell asleep to be completely sure that he was safe. It was a mechanism that stayed with him after taking care of his younger siblings. But that wasn’t the end of it. Another thing was that sometimes, they were sleeping four people in one bed, so any kind of shifting had to be limited to an absolute minimum. Keith never had such an experience, but he learnt not to kick Lance off of the bed every time they slept together. He did that for a few first times, but soon enough Lance had realized that he only needed to hold Keith tightly, nothing more than that. He was relaxed to the point when he was able to sleep peacefully for the whole night.

Lance smelled his boyfriend’s dark locks, surprised by the fact that he actually bought this shampoo Lance had recommended to him. Once, Keith said that Lance’s hair smelled impossibly nice, just like chocolate, so Lance sent him a picture of it, followed by a note saying that “this shampoo is an incredible thing, it does magic to your hair!” or something like that. He didn’t actually think that Keith would take it so seriously and buy it, and, more importantly, use it on a daily basis, though it was still incredibly nice of him. Lance was so happy to have a boy like him by his side every day, but still, these sleepovers were undoubtedly the best part of their lives. Lance was slowly falling asleep, feeling Keith’s steady heartbeat and listening to the rain drumming on his bedroom’s windows.

───────

The digital clock showed 3:24 in the morning and everyone should really be asleep by that time, but Keith felt his brain painfully enter reality again. The rain was a lot heavier now, Lance had to forget about closing the curtains, as now the storm had fully blown up and Keith couldn’t take that anymore. Thunders were only getting louder and louder each second, painfully contrasting with the silence of Lance’s house. On the other hand, lightnings were suddenly filling the room with white, blinding light, only to let it fade away after a second. Everything was dark and Lance’s arms around his waist kept him from going absolutely insane.

Not for long, though.

When a thunder hit somewhere that felt and sounded like a foot away from Keith, he couldn’t really take it anymore. He jumped in the bed, his fists clenched, muscles tense and his whole frame ready to hide. It could be anywhere, just as far away from this storm as possible. His breathing was hard, but he tried his best to keep it steady, so Lance wouldn’t wake up. He didn’t want his boyfriend to worry more than he did, but he couldn’t help his behavior, as much as he wanted to. It was actually too late to be thinking about all the ‘what if’ scenarios, because Lance was already awake by that time.

“Keith?” He groaned, his voice being a weird mixture of whispering and faint yelling, unlikely raspy and harsh. He tried to reach for his boyfriend, but he changed positions and was now sitting, which Lance realized after a solid minute of thinking. “What happened?” He tried asking, but Keith looked almost hypnotized.

His mouth was partly opened, his fists now grabbing at the covers. Lance was still lying down and desperately trying to process everything relatively quickly. When the new let of lights came out, Keith’s eyes immediately filled with panic, visible as ever, even though he could look at it for something that was probably less than a second.

“Where is your family?” He managed to ask after a few minutes of somehow awkward silence, but maybe it was more of a scary one, when Keith tried to make his mouth cooperate. The thing he asked about would be considered a weird question, as how could he know that, they should be all sleeping then. But the house’s vibes were different, oddly silent, Keith couldn’t stand it and the fact that Lance wasn’t answering him didn’t make things any better. “Lance, _where_ are they?” He asked again, practically yelping and begging Lance to answer him.

“They left to meet the rest of our family,” his hands traced slightly defined muscles on Keith’s forearm, trying their best to soothe his panic while Lance was talking. “My mom told us in the evening, but you were already falling asleep then. They’ll only be gone for a weekend, it’s not long, right?” Lance said it happily, because it was nothing Keith had to worry about. But it didn’t help.

Keith’s body was shaking like crazy, Lance had to hold him once again, but he refused to be touched. His eyes were locked at the window, which was closed, but the wind was blowing right at it, driving Keith absolutely insane.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Lance was now holding both of Keith’s hands and trying to make him look away from the window, but nothing was working. Lance _knew_ something was working and it was definitely connected with the storm. “Do you want me to contact Shiro?” He knew that Keith’s brother was always there when things were getting tough. He knew Keith better than anyone, so he was always the first choice in situations like this one. “Keith, I need you to answer, okay? Should I phone Shiro or make him come and get you?”

Keith wheezed and leaned closer when Lance placed his left hand on Keith’s face and began rubbing soft circles on his cheek.

“No, don’t,” he breathed out, feeling the tears slowly forming in his eyes. He didn’t want to cry around Lance, but this storm was getting worse and worse and Keith could’ve sworn that he felt the house move because of the wind. It was all starting to tire him out, but it was still somehow bearable.

“Are you sure, Keith?” Lance didn’t look convinced at all. “Maybe you could go home, something’s stressing you out and I don’t want this,” he kept whispering, his right hand now moving back and forth on Keith’s thigh, making his muscles slightly relax under Lance’s touch.

“I’m— sure,” be choked on his tears and finally let go of keeping them inside. “Just don’t phone him, it wouldn’t be nice to wake him— and Adam up after the whole week of working,” he explained and then jumped again as another thunder hit. “I don’t want to go home,” he whispered, almost mouthing all the words.

Shit, shit, shit – that was all Lance could think of at that exact time. He had to get what was happening with Keith, because he had never seen him panicked to that point. Keith was always sane and barely even stressing out, he could calmly survive all of his tests, so his behavior was more than just unusual. It simply _never_ happened. It had to be something absolutely terrifying if it made him react like that.

“Keith, talk to me, please,” Lance couldn’t let his own increasing panic take over his senses. He had to stay calm for Keith, to show him that he could count on him whenever he needed to. “Keith, you need to tell me what’s wrong, I want to help you, okay?” He took this way of speaking from Shiro, but Lance’s voice was something else – definitely softer and more caring. Shiro’s was more of a ‘dad’ one, but it was a good thing after all. It always helped anyone whom he was talking to, especially when they were stressed or just not feeling too good.

“Keith, listen to me,” Lance spoke up again, ready to help Keith as much as he could, scooping his boyfriend’s face in both of his hands. “I know it has something to do with the weather, I can’t figure out what exactly, but I want you to know one thing. I will try and help you the best I can, okay? You know I can do that, right? Just give me some clues, Keith, it’s going to be all okay when you do,” he wrapped his arms around Keith and pulled him into a tight hug, showing that he really deeply cared about him. “Please, hey, I won’t tell you to stop crying, it makes no sense. If you feel like it, cry. But please, try to talk to me, it would be really nice if you did, you know that one, right? I’m not going to force you, Keith, I’m here for you, but you could really help me out. Just tell me what’s wrong, we can make it better, baby, I promise.”

Keith nodded, but as soon as he opened his mouth he realized he wasn’t capable of saying any word he wanted. Everything that came out was a bunch of choked out sobs with some unintelligible whispers and it only made Keith even more panicked. He _wanted_ to help Lance out, he wanted to tell him, even if it was the stupidest reason ever, he just couldn’t make his voice chords cooperate. He had to focus on his breathing only if he wanted to keep everything together.

“Keith, hey,” Lance couldn’t give up like that, not with his panicking boyfriend by his side. “Look at me, right into my eyes, alright? Don’t focus on anything beside me. It’s just you and me now, Keith, no one else. It’s safe, you’re safe, everything’s good. Yeah, right! Focus on my eyes, good. Now, take deep breaths. Okay, repeat after me, inhale, then I count up, one, two, three. Now exhale, perfect! I love you, you’re doing great, baby,” he kept encouraging his boyfriend and he could really see the results. Keith was breathing far slower and more steadily, finally feeling like he was calming down. “Do you think you can try and tell me what’s bothering you? If not, don’t push yourself, okay?”

Keith exhaled heavier than before, but didn’t choke on his tears that time, so he considered it his little victory. He smelled Lance’s shampoo when he held him. Coconut and oranges made a weird yet pleasing combination. Lance had always smelled exactly like that, but way more faintly, so Keith really couldn’t guess if it was natural or perfumed, but he didn’t really care about it.

“I’m scared,” he finally answered, burying his face in Lance’s t–shirt. He _was_ ashamed of it, even if he knew that his boyfriend would never judge him for it. “Of storms.”

Lance smiled fondly, slowly unwrapping his arms from Keith’s frame and standing up from the bed. He made his way to the window and closed the curtains that had remained opened up until then. He slightly shrugged when his nicely warm feet touched the cold, wooden floor. He even jumped a little bit, only an inch or so, when the thunder came. Lance usually liked storms, but this one was really bad, it wasn’t surprising that Keith started feeling anxious about it. As much as how beautiful it usually was, now it became just straight up terrifying.

“It’s all better now, right?” He asked while coming back to the bed and gently moving the covers, so that they rested peacefully on his and Keith’s legs. One of Lance’s hands made its way to stay on Keith’s thigh and squeeze it gently, ostentatiously showing him that there was nothing to worry about anymore. “There’s nothing wrong with being scared of storms, I hope you know it. I’m also scared, of spiders, for example, and of Rachel sometimes, but don’t ever tell her that! My point is, nothing’s wrong with you and don’t you ever dare forget about it.”

Then he plopped on the mattress and pulled Keith with him, so that his head was tenderly resting on top of Lance’s chest and his fingers were slowly brushing through Keith’s hair. It was all good now, even better when Lance decided to press a soft kiss to Keith’s forehead. He glanced at the clock, noticing that it was almost five in the morning now, which meant he was trying to calm Keith down for over an hour and a half. But the amount of time didn’t matter as long as it turned out fine.

Keith mattered a lot to Lance and he couldn’t even imagine his life without him. He still tensed when the thunder hit, snuggling closer to Lance’s chest. His hands grabbed Lance’s shirt and held onto it, but lightly enough, so that Keith’s nails weren’t hurting his boyfriend.

“It’s going away, baby,” Lance whispered, rubbing soothing circles on Keith’s back. “It will be okay, I promise. Nothing’s going to hurt you. Come on, close your eyes, focus on breathing and try to fall asleep, okay? It’s been a long night for you.”

Keith couldn’t get what he did to deserve such a cute, caring boyfriend. He was everything Keith could ever want, even if he was acting like a total fool around their friends or families, Keith knew who Lance really was.

“Thank you,” he whispered, already drifting to sleep, but still wanting to tell him how grateful he was for Lance dealing with him. He literally did _everything_ right, there was no single doubt about it. “For being here for me,” he added, yawning and letting a sleepy smile form on his face.

“What else would I do?” Lance laughed, trying his best not to yawn after every word, because this night had really drained him. “No, but seriously, anytime, Keith,” he kissed his boyfriend’s bangs, then pulled him even closer and rested his chin on top of Keith’s head. He couldn’t believe it was all good like that, even if the situation wasn’t pleasing at all. “Goodnight.”

Keith wanted to say it should be more like a ‘good morning’, but not quite. It made him chuckle right before he completely fell asleep. He felt Lance squeeze him tighter, as if he was trying to show him that he was protected and couldn’t be but by anything or anyone in this world. Keith kept smiling in his sleep, knowing that he could literally fight anything with Lance by his side.

“I love you, samurai,” Lance mumbled before falling asleep himself.

It was all perfect now.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you all for reading!! I love you all, remember that
> 
> you can message me on twitter @ spritzerrrr or on tumblr @ loverboy-spritz !!


End file.
